fiq

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Jumat, 04 Agustus 2006

Funny Corporate Lessons

Corporate Lesson 1

A priest offered a lift to a Nun.

She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg.
The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg.

The nun said, “Father, remember Psalm 129?”
The priest removed his hand.

But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again.
The nun once again said, “Father, remember Psalm 129?”

The priest apologized “Sorry sister but the flesh is weak.”
Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her way.

On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129.
It said, “Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory.”

Moral of the story: If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great opportunity.


Corporate Lesson 2

A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp.

They rub it and a Genie comes out.

The Genie says, “I’ll give each of you just one wish.”
“Me first! Me first!” says the admin. clerk.

“I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world” Poof! She’s gone.

“Me next! Me next!” says the sales rep. “I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life.” Poof! He’s gone.

“OK, you’re up,” the Genie says to the manager.

The manager says, “I want those two back in the office after lunch.”

Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.


Corporate Lesson 3

A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day.
A rabbit asked him, “Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?”

The crow answered: “Sure, why not.”

So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested.
A fox jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very high up.


Corporate Lesson 4

A turkey was chatting with a bull.

“I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree,” sighed the turkey, but I haven’t got the energy.”

“Well, why don’t you nibble on my droppings?” replied the bull. “They’re packed with nutrients.”

The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree.

The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.

Finally after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree.

Soon he was spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.

Moral of the story: Bullshìt might get you to the top, but it won’t keep you there.

I hope he will survive

Gold Porche





They grow up marihuana !!!

American company New Image Plants is engaged in manufacture of ornamental plants for offices, for the house, for family. Usual, in general, business. Here only instead of traditional ficuses and palm trees the company offers not that other, as ? marihuana!
Intresting and fun to have artificial marihuana in your home.





I want in a monastery!


What can I say ... I really want in a monastery ( like this ).Join me ? :)

For Drinking Coffe & Smoking

The idea was born in cafe, during expectation of a pure ashtray.If at the moment of a smoke break it is heavy to hold a mug on weight, it can be put... On a napkin:)


Why no posts ?

I'm sure that some of my loyal readers ask this question ... "Why no posts ?".

Ok .. let's answer.

1.In the last month I have problems with internet conection, I'm on dialup, and only after 20:00 I can acces the internet.I tryed to stay awake a few nights, but after a week I got tired.Is hard to stay awake all night and sleep durring the day.

2.
I've lost a lot of materials for my blog.I had an archive of materials, and one day my computer suddenly turned off and all the materials dissapeared.

3.This day's I've spend some time with my friends on a festival in our town, and we party all night.I also made some new friends, and a girlfriend. :)

This day's I'll try to post more on this blog, because this weekend I have 24/24 acces to internet. :) So .... I'm back ....

P.S - If someone has something that think I can publish just email me.

fiq